Bright waters of oblivion
in deepest streams of consciousness,
ripple and refresh
all hidden corners of our lives.
all hidden corners of our lives.
Their currents move us forward
at a pace the river chooses,
and as human flotsam-jetsam,
we all float, but who knows why?
Still across the crystal surface
of this source which bubbles upwards,
shadow leaves continue swirling,
each a life with its own path.
But these rivers do not falter,
are fulfilled by every journey
without a thought of where they flow
or what is meant to be...
Written earlier, but offered to P&SU #99, where today's prompt is 'Why?'
Yes we are often unaware and just go with the flow of life, not knowing where. I think we do have a destination, but because of we have choices, which are not always wise, we might take a detour or never arrive Great poem which gives lots to think about
ReplyDeletePerhaps making an unwise choice, is how we are given opportunity to understand ourselves more, thus making us unlikely to make the same mistake again?
DeleteThe lovely rhythm seems to echo the moving of the river, and thereby to underpin the veracity of what you say.
ReplyDeleteFull marks for 'hearing' the rhythm of this song-without-music! :-)
DeleteSweet oblivion is what I aim for every night . . .
ReplyDeleteWhat, no colourful dreams to enjoy? That would be a pity. :-)
DeleteLovely and lyrical. This piece flows like a stream I hope never dries up. :)
ReplyDeleteFor as long as writers record their words, and make a thought-trail for others to follow, I guess the stream is unlikely to come to a halt!
DeleteInteresting thoughts on the deep waters of unconsciousness.
ReplyDeletePerhaps they begin to make more sense if they rise to the surface and help awareness grow? Just another unanswered question, I guess. :-)
DeleteI like the way you reduce the syllable count in the last line of each stanza (8 to 6 or 7) so that, reading the poem aloud, each stanza 'closes' before moving on to the next poetic thought. Really good work.
ReplyDeleteToo kind, Doc! I was only obeying the rhythms of the words I 'heard' in my head, not paying attention to counting syllables, so I can't take credit. I leave that to my inner 'voice'!
DeleteGorgeous poem, Jinksy!!! As deep as the water you write of.
ReplyDeleteCome swim with me any time, Helen. LOL :-)
DeleteLife is a river. Nice personification and metaphor.
ReplyDeleteThanks for paddling along to Napple Notes ,A.C. :-)
DeleteWho knows why?...The search for meaning... that is what we are all caught up in ...I loved the way you described it in your beautiful poem
ReplyDeleteThank you for coming by to read it, Jossina. :-)
DeleteI love this! It flows like a stream.
ReplyDeleteThe words certainly flow out of my head when my muse is on a roll. LOL Some just say I have verbal diarrhoea!
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