Wednesday, 28 July 2010

Stuck With Morning

So the subject is almost the same today as yesterday - but earlier, if you get my drift? In other words, at 3am my eyes opened their shutters, even with my eyelids closed, and for the next hour and a half I battled to stay in dreamland. I lost. Morning won.

The battlefied is now covered, not with blood, but words - those of yet another etheree, which I have coupled with a doodle inspired by birds. By the time you've read to the end, you should get the connection.



Sleep
departs
for the night;
early morning
has now captured me
in wakeful stranglehold.
Determined to quash my dreams,
the dawn light and birdsong chorus
together announce approach of day,
transposing reveries into stark facts.

For a slightly different take on the etheree go here, and be sure to read the comments!

28 comments:

  1. awwww.... you're good, mama... you're good :)

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  2. Now Now, Jinksy! You leave my etherees alone, awright?

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  3. That's interesting Jinksy. I have never heard of etheree poetry. Sounds like fun though. Must try it sometime. - Dave

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  4. Hi Jinksy. I do sympathise. Last night ended after 2am and today started at 5.30. I hate nights like that but have too many.

    Love the poem - what an interesting form! You are clever.

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  5. Are the curves in your artwork (Don't call it a doodle!) drawn freehand? They are just . . . . smoooooth! Great picture.

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  6. No, they are one of the beauties of the Paint programme – you produce a straight line, then ‘bend it like Beckham’ however you choose! How can it be anything but a doodle? Although I coloured it, cropped it and called it ‘Birdflight’, it remains a doodle, Doc.

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  7. Amazed again...which is a good thing

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  8. Doodle or not, its very good. You got talent! Wouldn't this one make a beautiful design for a window?

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  9. Love the doodling and the etheree; also the link.

    Last night and several in the past weeks have been wrestling with blood pressure spikes -- finally have a name malignant hypertension--not happy, but treatable with more dietary changes and medicine, possibly stint in my one and only renal artery.

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  10. Another goodie, Jinksy, with picture to match. Can't help noticing though, that like Doc FTSE's, your ninth line has ten syllables!

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  11. Thanks, Derrick! I was obviously still too asleep to count properly at that unearthly hour! Have now edited to nine...

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  12. Derrick . . thanks. I have made a suggestion as to how I could correct the word count in my ninth line. A comment HERE explains why I didn't follow the suggestion through!

    Nar then! Wouldn't you just know there are also "DOUBLE ETHEREES"

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  13. Hey, Doc! I haven't got to grips with the single version yet, never mind the fact that two stanzas have got to make twice as much sense!

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  14. Start counting Derrick!

    No
    stalling;
    rhyme’s calling,
    begging my brain
    to start work again
    on yet another set
    of rhyming couplets. So let
    battle commence! Get brain in gear
    choose words to make the enemy fear
    the lash of tongue or mental cut and thrust

    designed to conquer, though that be unjust
    in what should be a friendly skirmish.
    May each foray end as I wish
    in compatible joining
    of like with like, bringing
    harmony to all.
    forget the call
    to arms. Smile!
    Worthwhile,
    No?

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  15. That is a testament to Jinksy's skill! I eMailed her about the "double etheree" form about 40 minutes before she posted! And please do note, folks . . . it's strictly rhymed. And notice the symmetry of "No" to "No?" She surely gets our votes, while the rest of us should quietly get our coats . . .

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  16. You will learn one day, not to challeng me, Doc - or anybody else for that matter! LOL :)

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  17. Erm - except when it comes to my typing or counting skills... CallengE those all you like!

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  18. You're too good for me, Jinksy!!

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  19. See what I mean? CHALLENGE!

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  20. And you Derrick, would appear to be too fast for me with your comments!LOL :)

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  21. Seems I shall have to try this tonight Jinksy when I wake at three o'clock thinking it is morning.

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  22. Ooer - and I'm still thinking about attempting an etheree. I can't keep up - but then I never could ;-)

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  23. jinksy this is real pretty!
    Pamela

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  24. such beautiful words from a woman who spent today half asleep! this was lovely, jinksy, and i think your artsy thing is pretty great, too! some of your best work seems to be done with lack of sleep ;)

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  25. You are a talented doodler and poet. And I love to read these discussions in your comments section. Very entertaining ;-)
    That double etheree is so clever.

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  26. Ooooh...that's quite lovely, Jinksy. And the double one, well, it's doubly clever.

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  27. Wow, what a treasure trove to be found here. I love your etheree (so true, so true) and learning about this form. Thanks for stopping by RA, and I, in turn, will look forward to return visits here!

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  28. A treasure, indeed. I'm off too see what the etheree might be! ~Brenda

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